4/ Throwing around bravery

Sitting in a hostel in Ha Giang, Vietnam.

Nerves. Butterflies in my belly.Building work adjacent, breaking the air and my concentration. Distracting me slightly (thankfully).

Motorbikes lined up for an adventure. Anticipation. Nerves. Fear. Excitement.

I’ve already written about management of expectations; I’m trying on this trip to limit what I see and know about places. I want the surprise factor and to create more of a sense of awe.

However, it was difficult not to read about the sad passing of Orla Wates on the Ha Giang loop. Not only did this give a moment of pause for reflection on how her family must be feeling, but also how short life can be and the weight of making certain choices.

As I’m sure most would, I took all the right precautions. Double-checked my insurance policy. Went with the safest company I could find. Checked reviews. Asked ChatGPT. Searched Reddit. Spoke to people.

So, with the growing pang of risk vs reward, my dial was firmly on risk.

This may seem careless given the recent circumstances; however, I am using this year to test my stomach, nerve and appetite for doing the uncomfortable.

I am glad I did.

I met amazing people. Saw incredible views. Jumped in waterfalls. Ate local food. Saw rural Vietnam through a completely different lens.

Now, many people threw the word brave at me before setting off on this journey, which I think reflected more about social norms and expectations than me doing anything wildly brave.

BUT.

Balancing risk and reward. Overcoming butterflies. Feeling culturally uncomfortable can only build a more creative and diverse mindset… right?

I want to take you back almost 20 days from Ha Giang. My stint in Australia and Japan completed. Next flight: Hanoi.

AND it was a shock.

Traffic (the scooters!) Street food. Humidity. Look. Feel. Chaos. Energy.

Dropped off at my hotel. Tried to cross the road — with great difficulty.

A few days later I saw a T-shirt that summed up the road system in Hanoi:

“Green is for go. Amber is for go. Red is for go.”

The road system wasn’t the only thing I found discombobulating.

As someone with IBS, travelling itself is already anxiety-inducing. Pile on top a street food scene that UK hygiene agencies would be shutting down in a second… eeeek.

The first day and a half food…Pringles. Chocolate bars. Biscuits. Fruit (not pre-prepared… oh no).

Then I got over myself.

BECAUSE IT WORKS

The chaotic and vibrant energy works. The food scene works.

I ate where Barack Obama and Anthony Bourdain ate (note — not necessarily my food highlights). Banh mi from the hotspots. Pâté. Steak. Egg and Some kind of gravy situation. Pho. Little sweet prawns. Hot pot. Spring rolls. Crab fresh on Lan ha bay.

Overcoming that kind of anxiety was a huge win for me. A brave one in my world.

BUT. I don’t really want to throw around the word bravery. It should be kept for bigger purposes — soldiers, nurses, charity workers and the like.

However, personal context is important. The controllables in your world are important. Having a newfound appreciation for things I can do is nice.

Brave? Maybe not. Risk vs reward? Maybe.

Now, being driven on the back of a motorcycle through Northern Vietnam’s landscape gave me a lot of time to think.

That trip, for my friend and me, cost 22.6 million Vietnamese dong — including the driver’s tip and transport to and from our hotels (an 18-hour round trip). Roughly £630 for a 3-day adventure.

Minimum wage in Ha Giang province is around 3.7 million VND / The average wage is roughly double that — around 7.4 million VND.

Rural farm workers are typically on minimum wage, tourism workers around the average and mining/government roles at the higher end.

So what I spent on that trip could have paid someone’s salary in the lower bracket for around 6 months.

I’m no expert, but I broadly understand economics and how it differs across countries.

I also noticed something else - People waking up to beautiful surroundings every day.Communities that felt strong and connected. I met Neam (my driver) and his family — living in a village deep on the Ha Giang loop in Du Gia - They were all joyful and wanted to meet. A different pace of life and different trappings.

So I make no assumptions. No direct comparisons of money to quality of life.

But it did make me stop and think. Throwing around the word bravery feels… interesting.

Tom, our guide, spoke about how tourism over the last ten years has supported a significant number of jobs. We spoke about how locals enjoy the cultural exchange — showing off their Vietnam.

I travelled through Ha Giang, Quan Ba, Lung Tam, Du Gia, Meo Vac, Dong Van and Yen Minh.

Through communities of Tay, Hmong (high in the mountains), and Kinh people.

After my trip, I visited the Precious Heritage Art Gallery in Hoi An — a collection of photos and traditional clothing following an 11-year mission by Réhahn to document all 54 ethnic groups in Vietnam.

It explores the balance between tradition, economic change and a shifting world.

A reminder of balance. Maintaining tradition. Tourism helping and hindering.

It feels to me like risk is required and sometimes bravery too. But it needs to be grounded in a reward that feels worth going after.

Now that… is a personal decision.

3/ The big pivot

"I'm a big believer in winging it. I'm a big believer that you're never going to find the perfect city travel experience or the perfect meal without a constant willingness to experience a bad one” – Anthony Bourdain. 

A bad one you say Anthony…

‘blue regions’ are where residents live significantly longer and healthier lives, often reaching age 100 or older (centenarians) with lower rates of chronic diseases.

A big goal of mine this year is to hit the five recognised blue regions since watching Dan Butteners documentary which talks of;

Plant forward diet.

Natural movement.

Purpose and lifestyle.

Community and connection. 

Following visiting Tokyo, Hakuba, Kyoto in Japan – Okinawa (blue region) was next. Now I’ve been working on a flexible mindset for my travels, virtually nothing is booked more than two weeks out, I’ve also been a little lax on research and using the mantra the best things usually happen when you don’t plan. AND so on that….

I had wrongfully made the assumption that transport around Okinawa would be in parallel to mainland Japan – WRONG. VERY WRONG. 

Landing into Naha, southern Okinawa and albeit a relatively small island, Ogimi the village of centenarians to the North was a good 3 hour drive. First big plan failing… I hadn’t got an international driving license! I realised this when doing minimal forward (ish) planning in Kyoto and I had a semi-melt down… Take a breath, think about the controllable.

BUT, did this mean I wasn’t going to make my blue region vision a possibility? 

As Ross famously shouted in friends “Pivot”. 

I sat down and wrote out those key blue region elements, did some googling, used chat GPT and my brain.  

My pivot plan was born… 

Okinawa food was available all over the island not just ogimi, I found plenty and it pushed me to explore way more in different ways than I would have. Purple potato – good. Sashimi – good. Okinawa noodles – good. Mozuko seaweed with vinegar – good. Mozuko seaweed with kimchi – not so good. But chowing down on the Plant forward diet .

Imagine at 81 you are waking up in the morning, making your way to your Dojo, starting a class off by stretching out better than a insta bali teacher! Well, Okinawa is not only the home of karate itself and Mr Miagi of karate kid fames home town, it also has karate master 10th dan sensei Kakazu, who taught me and coached me for a few days – Even at his ripe age he’s still smashing it - punching, chopping, kicking his way through natural movement. Even those warm up stretches were tough and wonderfully humbling, with more black belts in the room than floorboards. There was also a family vibe, special moment was watching Kuko ( tiny little baby boy), watch his mother give an almighty show on how bloody good at karate she was. Find good people.

                  With Ogimi village off the table. I had to explore, part of the Okinawa prefecture are a group of islands, the kerama islands. What better way to see the real blue region than rural island life. Here I really felt a deep connection with a slower pace of life, eating off the land & sea and observing a passion for the environment – feeling the islands Purpose and lifestyle around necessity. ( I also had the most jaw dropping awe inducing moments, watching humpback whales. That’s for another day and another post.) 

                  So, from mainland Okinawa to Zamami island to Aka island, I got positive vibes. In Naha I joined a group of random people from all over the world including Okinawan locals, with a rain stick in my hand and danced on the street.  Sang karaoke with Miku a bar lady in an empty place ( I did look high and low for a busy one, so I howled some solo renditions of Oasis – Sorry Miku), chatted to Sabrina a journalist from Singapore over a beer, watched a humpback whale jump out the water with sushi our guide. Created my own connection and community.

In my invisible filing cabinet of stuff, I know I can pivot. I’ve done it many times in life and work. But this one felt good, I thought I was nearly ripping apart a big part of my purpose on my travels. 

I found a workaround. a solution. Took a pause. Figured out the controllables. AND pivoted. 

Blue region 1/5. It didn’t go to plan, but it didn’t let down. 

So I never did get to Ogimi village. 

But I think I got a realer look what makes this place special - not just one village but how  people live. I GOT INVOLVED.

It also again gave me time to reflect on my IKIGAI, something I have been drawing on for years. 

Less ticking a box, more exploring ideas. 

P.s. You’ll be happy to know my international driving license is en-route.

Next stop Vietnam…

2/ HaHaHa moments

Just around a month ago, a guy sitting next to me on a plane asked a question that hasn't left my head since “How much of your life are you producing content and how much are you actually living?

Now I am 6 weeks into my sabbatical and if you look at my Instagram, it probably looks like I am having an absolute blast. Which is pretty accurate in the main.

So far, I’ve travelled through 2 countries, 6 cities, rested my head in 9 different places, ascended & descended 4 mountains, celebrated my birthday, wandered with an angled neck & look of awe on countless streets and met a lot of interesting people on the way.

Felix, who was sitting next to me on the plane from Tasmania and I ended up chatting about ‘How much we produce vs how much we are living?’.We were talking about social media at the time, but it stuck in my head.

Although I am not always the most structured person, most of my adult life I have lived in quite a structured world. That world creates a hum and rhythm. Deadlines, measurable progress, feedback or responsibility. Particularly when you lead teams

Then BAM, I’ve chosen to make that all disappear.

No diary. No meetings. No targets. No KPI. Just time andIt’s WONDERFUL but also psychologically disorientating.

A few mornings ago I woke up in Kyoto, Japan with no plan and just wandered out into the day. This is where I noticed something happening again. Something I can only describe as a ‘hahaha moment’a genuinely, slightly manic laugh to myself & sometimes out loud because I can’t help myself.

Like…

The second day of travels walking out on to my brother’s balcony with a coffee, listening to the birds, watching the sunrise and realising this is actually real. ‘Hahaha moment’

Looking out of the plane window over Tasmania realising there’s a whole new island to explore with pals. ‘hahaha moment’

A lock-in at a Tasmanian pub with friends and the owner. ‘hahaha moment’

Sitting on a chairlift going up the mountain in Hakuba with a snowboard strapped to my feet. ‘hahaha moment’

Meeting this cool vibey person In the hostel I was staying at, we listened to a band and danced across a floor painted with the map of Japan ‘hahaha moment’

Watching a buddhist fire festival in Nara park surrounded by hundreds of people witnessing  this epic ceremony ‘hahaha moment’

Moments where I just sit there and laugh because I’m just bloody happy I pushed myself to do this, grateful I had the opportunity and aware I worked hard to get to a point where I could.

The funny thing is, while I am away these moments are coming thicker and faster. But they existed at home too, I think my eyes are just more open to find them now.

Now, as my dad once said, life can’t all be unicorns and fluffy stuff. Realism. Boooooo, but true, so here’s some balance.

I’ve also had some low or weird gut moments.

I’ve walked through Ameyoko market in Tokyo. Surrounded by this Incredible energy, culture. sitting in a izakaya with a beer & trying to converse with a Japanese guy who doesn’t speak English. Eating food from street vendors. A shrine, temples and yet my body is still saying ‘What are you doing?’ ‘am I wasting my time?’ or ‘shouldn’t I be doing something more productive’

My nervous system is still expecting. That structure doesn’t disappear overnight.

OR

The  night before I leave my brothers in Sydney for Japan, where my anxiety sky rocketed.

“What if I don’t meet anyone”

“What if I get lonely”

“How will I even get around”

“Am I actually doing the right thing”

Gut give me a break please. luckily I also had my brother there for that to talk sense into me too, find good people.

My invisible filing cabinet is filling up more, with these moments uncomfortable and hahaha ones. They are all part of the beans, bricks and beaches philosophy - it really is all grounding, growth and gratitude.

So, I’d say I’m still In the quite uncomfortable stage, but as long as the frequent ‘hahaha moments’ keep coming.

I’m here for that.

Safe to say, I’m not coming home early.

note, the above are just a minor selection of lots of ‘hahaha moments’ AND for Steve coogan, if you ever come across this, hahaha is very different to an Alan Partridge ‘aha’ ;) No copyright infringement.

1/ Emptying bins to exploring the JOurneY

17 years ago, I was in Manchester having dropped out of my studies, figuring out what to do. A little lost, embarrassed and feeling like I’d let people down, Including myself. So I jumped into a few jobs - bar jobs, holding a sign for a whole day on Oldham street, to selling tickets in IBIZA. Then I started my first shift at M&S Trafford centre- my first job emptying bins. Fast forward to today - Head of supply chain at B&Q, Founder of a little outdoor collective - ‘Beans, Bricks & Beaches’ and about to step into a 12-month sabbatical to travel, connect & explore.

Navigating life has ups, downs and in betweens. As part of that navigation, I’ve had lots of moments of feeling a little lost. Something I’m now quite accustomed to and positive about, being lost is no bad thing. Recently covid isolation, heartbreak and not quite being where the world expects you to be - continues to teach me - Stay curious, enjoy community and live the JOurneY to find joy.

I have led teams, launched a hike club, ran up mountains, quelled the anxiety of public speaking, seeked help, been the help, had fun and kept stepping outside my comfort zone. What’s helped me has been Leaning on resilience & taking accountability, to find more JOY (You’ll see some stuff keep popping up, for that I am not sorry, joy is one of them)

One of the the things to find more joy has been figuring out how to make connections as I get older and navigating lots of the journey on my own. Embracing my philosophy on life, ‘beans, bricks and beaches - Grounding, growth and gratitude’. making sure that when I got lost, I sought energy to make me feel good, like…

Joining a trail run club ‘MRP or Maverick run Purbeck’ - Tom & JV you legends - some people may never know how it feels when you live alone for someone to take you for a chicken wrap. Why? because you’ve just dived into the sea to cool off post run, can’t get in your car because the electric keys that were in your pocket are now soaked and that means you can’t also get in your home because your keys are in said car, as is your phone. In your head this feels apocalyptic at the time. That chicken wrap felt good in that moment - find good people.

Consistent Tuesday night tennis & a pint of Guinness with my pal Jack - I’ve told him this. But it’s amazing having a mate to just have a hit with, sit down for a pint with and be able to be open up with - find good people.

Testing myself recently at public speaking, sharing vulnerable ideas, being invited to national professional events and making cool connections - find good people.

Picking up my camera again and started shooting stories. It’s actually quite hard to hold yourself to account to do things even ones you love and feel positive vibes about when you’re alone - Find good in yourself.

Now when I say alone I want to be clear alone doesn’t always mean lonely, it sometimes means gloriously flexible. No pressure other than yourself and an ability to do whatever you want! But it does also come with a solo tax - not just a financial one (although it does, It costs the average single person in the UK around 30% more than those in partnerships or families) also a mental one and an accountability pressure on yourself - driving your own energy. The dark days can become very dark and the light ones very bright - Finding bright days are more fun and joyful.

I have also become even more thirsty to search out great moments, great communities, great people and great stories.

AND curiosity is calling me again - this time with travel.

Begining a sabbatical in January ‘26, I’m hoping to see lots of Australia, Asia, the Americas and travel as many of the blue regions as I can ( but who knows, I’m keeping it flexible). So from emptying bins, to feeling lost, transforming teams, to walking in as much green. I’m still curious. Still learning. Still moving forward.

I have a key guiding rule that has stayed with me for along as I can remember… Do the right thing, not the easy thing.